When attending a less than exhilarating course
To stay focused requires concentration of superhuman force
My fingers will begin to wander across my facial skin
Inevitably discovering a wiry whisker protruding from my chin
Then my train of thought begins to meander
To colleagues possible comments and slander
”Oh have you seen that bearded woman?”
Never heeding facial depilation is positively subhuman
Trying to pluck it out with stumpy fingernails
Strong and defiant, of course that fails
Why? Why did I not pack a pair of tweezers?
Now convinced I resemble a pubescent geezer
Trying to concentrate on dull lecturer’s designer dress
My aggravation escalating into panic and stress
I’m now convinced I’ve mutated into Winnie the Witch
Perhaps I should accept vanity is never without a hitch
That lady in the lilac chiffon is staring at me
Now I’m praying it’s nearly time to stop for tea
I rest my face upon my hand
Thoughts trickle through my brain like sand
Me before a mirror analysing the offending hair
It with hardy root and bristly glare
Then I almost speak aloud my exclamation “Oh Heck!”
There is another one coiling from my neck.